Old Testament Guys and Me

I am feeling a bit like Abraham (Genesis 15), Jonah (Jonah 4), Job (Most of the whole book of Job), Elijah (1 Kings 19), Saul (1 Samuel 16:14ff), Jeremiah (Most of Jeremiah and Lamentations) and David (Psalm 6, 13, 18 and MANY more)...

These fellows were saddened to the point of depression. Jobs friends (and I use this term lightly) even told him that he should curse God and die. I realize that staying sad or depressed or whatever for too long can cause us to fall into other forms of darkness. I also know that true happiness is not dependent upon my situations. However, life is just hard sometimes.

People have asked me if being depressed (or needing medicine for depression/anxiety) is a sin. No, I don't believe it is. It is very painful, though, especially if you are surrounded by people who don't understand that it is more than just a prayer or sin problem. I believe that God speaks to us even in sadness and depression. I believe that it is just another struggle of living in a fallen world. I believe God made someone smart enough to develop medication to ease the effects of depression.

I woke up today and rolled over thinking, "I am not sure that I give a crap about anything today." Now, deep down I know that isn't true. I know that I care deeply about Bennett, my friends and family, my students and my church. However, I was just not feeling like getting out of bed so much (rest assured I am typing this from my desk at work. So I did get up.). Sometimes to battle the funk I have to do things I don't necessarily want to (like get out of bed). God wants us to take actions each day that bring us closer to him and into life abundant. Occasionally, all we can do is make ourselves get up and go to work. Other times we take lots of proactive steps towards healing, wholeness and a life of joy. Both things are okay. What isn't okay is staying in the crypt (bed) all day every day... even though it seems easier and lots of times better.

I know that this is pretty much just me rambling today, sorry. Nonetheless, this is what is on my mind and what I am struggling with today. At least I am in the company of some of the Old Testament's bests.